These are a few of my favorite things...

number one when a dog bites... ouch!
number two when a bee stings... I'm allergic!
when I'm feeling sad... single tear!

Just kidding that is a SNL skit with Will Farrell from who knows how long ago.

Yesterday as good things happened to me I thought these could be considered my favorite things (for the day), and I thought I needed to keep a record of it. Here it is.

I love it when I have Abigail and Isabelle on my lap on the couch. I love it when they scream in excitement at each other and then laugh. I love it when they take turns screaming at each other. I love the facial expressions they make to each other and the excitement that is on their face when they see each other up close.

I love it when I am cooking dinner and Chris is playing with them and he encourages Abigail to fight back. Isabelle is so curious and when she sees a new toy (that Abigail has in her hand) she without fail reaches out and grabs it from Abigail. Last night Chris encouraged Abigail saying steal it back, defend yourself, and fight back! I couldn't help but laugh as I heard this... but don't know about this in the long term for teaching the girls good things...

I love finding good recipes online and altering them to fit what I have in the fridge and making a MAGNIFICENT meal. Yesterday I didn't know what to make for dinner and so I googled "chicken recipe" and found the Kraft Canada website. It listed the top 10 chicken meals. I made what they called "parmesan chicken wraps" but I would NOT call what I made that...
I cut chicken breasts in half as to have a pouch where I could put a filling (as I don't have a meat pounder so I couldn't wrap the breast around a stuffing). I filled the chicken breast with blendered cooked broccoli and cauliflower (that I had in the fridge from a few nights ago) and added a couple scoops of cream cheese, some basil, oregano and salt and pepper and blended it all together. After the chicken breast was stuffed I dipped it in beaten egg and rolled it in cracker crumbs. I then put some pasta sauce on it and grated cheddar cheese. I cooked it for an hour at 375 degrees. With the left over pasta sauce I added herbs (oregano and basil) and salt and pepper and a cut up yellow pepper and let it simmer for a couple hours on the stove. When the chicken was almost cooked I boiled some spaghetti noodles and called it done. Chris raved about it and I shoveled it into my mouth... needless to say it was a good dinner!

I love it when Relief Society and Elders Quorum lessons spark a question or two that lead to Chris and I spending the evening (or him all day) researching and learning together.

THESE are a few of my favorite things!

Saturday Night Already?

Sometimes it is the weekend before I even realized it is past Tuesday! This week flew by. I am sure the nights out visiting teaching added to the speed of this week passing, or the fact that Chris had his first two exams in school this week.
Abigail got two teeth this week! She was slightly fussy one day and I thought "oh maybe she is teething" and didn't check. That night she woke up (unheard of) in giant sobs. The next morning I felt her little gums and boom two teeth poking my finger. The next morning they were all the way through! I was so happy. Her getting teeth was such a difference than my other little girl. Funny that she got them at EXACTLY the same time! Maybe she is the reason I got two babies?
Abigail has been up on her knees for about a week or two thinking about learning to crawl. She has started rocking back and forth on her hands and knees and it is the cutest thing ever. She has moved forward once but it is a slow process.  Isabelle on the other hand started to get up on her hands and knees about 3 days ago and tonight during our carpet time after baths she was up on her knees and moved it forward only to fall quickly onto her face! But with excited encouragement from her Mama she kept trying for the next 30 minutes. It is so fun to see them both learn how to do something. They both learn how to do it in different ways and have different abiltities and talents that are evident as I watch with anticipation as they learn to crawl. This is joy!

Lessons I have learned

In the last week or so I have been thinking over and over again that days are SO MUCH BETTER when I exercise. Every time I stay awake in the morning instead of going back to bed when the girls do and I exercise I am on top of the world. For me waiting until the end of the day makes it harder, Chris is home and I am MUCH more tired. When I do exercise my house is cleaner, I make better dinners, I stay on top of laundry, I am happier, I smile more, I think of others more, I play more with my babies and make them laugh, I spend less time on the computer, I eat better (unless I make pumpkin muffins)... the list could go on AND on BUT what I am trying to say is that every day is better when I exercise. There are still the moments when I think ahh maybe not today but once I start I feel great! I love getting sweaty, feeling my heart pump harder and breathing deeply. It is a gentle reminder (or not so gentle) that I am taking care of my body. Who doesn't want to be happier, make better dinners, and all around feel more satisfied?
Something else I have learned is that you can't exercise if you feel poorly about yourself or that your worth depends on wether or not you exercise and soley on what you look like (or don't look like). IF you do, you are doomed to fail, because the one day you don't makes you feel like a complete FAILURE. This is something that has taken me years to understand. Perhaps I still have more to learn about it, and perhaps this isn't true for everyone, but it is for me.

Sweet Potato Soup

Today  I spent about 3 solid hours in the kitchen (don't worry I wasn't neglecting my babies). The girls were asleep for at least 2.5 hours of it- they had to catch up from yesterday when they had a whopping 1hr and 45minutes of sleep! Stake conference and post stake conference festivities left them two tired babies. Abigail fell asleep AS soon as we put her down. I'm talking we put a binky in her mouth and wrapped her up in her blanket and she closed her eyes. It was so cute and funny. I digress, back to the kitchen!
Today I made pumpkin muffins (heavenly), sweet potato soup, quinoa patties AND three types of food for the girls: sweet potato, acorn squash and butternut squash.The soup is amazing. Chris said that when he was coming home he could smell it from outside! I made this soup last year too but I don't think I ever served it for dinner. I told Chris on the phone today "I am doing something different for dinner tonight so don't say anything bad about it!" I think I have served soup for dinner less than five times since we have been married. One was last night when we had tomato soup and tuna melts!
Anyways the recipes are so good I wanted to share them. They are perfect for the season. Also the girls LOVED the butternut squash- my work (which was practically nothing) was not wasted!!

African Sweet Potato and Peanut Soup

• 1 tablespoon vegetable oil
• 1 large onion, chopped
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 2 teaspoons minced fresh ginger root
• 1 1/2 teaspoons ground cumin
• 1 1/2 teaspoons ground coriander
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1 pinch ground cloves
• 3 medium tomatoes, chopped
• 1 1/2 pounds sweet potatoes, peeled and chopped
• 1 carrot, peeled and chopped
• 4 1/2 cups water
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 cup chopped, unsalted dry-roasted peanuts
• 1 pinch cayenne pepper
• 2 tablespoons creamy peanut butter
• 1 bunch chopped fresh cilantro

Directions

1. Heat the oil in a large saucepan over medium-high heat. Saute the onion 10 minutes, until lightly browned. Mix in the garlic, ginger, cumin, coriander, cinnamon, and cloves. Stir in the tomatoes, sweet potatoes, and carrot, and continue to cook and stir about 5 minutes.
2. Pour water into the saucepan, and season the mixture with salt. Bring to a boil, reduce heat, and simmer 30 minutes.
3. Remove the soup mixture from heat. In a food processor or blender, blend the soup and peanuts until almost smooth. Season with cayenne pepper. Return to the saucepan. Whisk in the peanut butter, and cook until heated through. Serve warm topped with fresh cilantro.

NOTE: I did NOT put in the tomotoes!

Pumpkin Muffins

• 1 small sugar pumpkin, seeded
• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 2 cups white sugar
• 2 teaspoons baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
• 2 teaspoons ground cloves
• 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
• 2 teaspoons ground nutmeg
• 1 teaspoon ground allspice
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 2/3 cup vegetable oil
• 3 eggs

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease 12 muffin cups or line with paper muffin liners.
2. Split pumpkin in half. Remove seeds and strings. Place on baking sheet, cut side down. Cover with foil and bake in preheated oven until tender, about 90 minutes. Remove pumpkin pulp and puree in blender. Measure out 2 cups pumpkin puree; set aside.
3. In a large bowl, stir together flour, sugar, baking soda, baking powder, cloves, cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice and salt. In a separate bowl, beat together 2 cups pumpkin puree, vegetable oil and eggs. Stir pumpkin mixture into flour mixture until smooth. Scoop batter into prepared muffin cups.
4. Bake in preheated oven for 20 to 25 minutes, until a toothpick inserted into the center of a muffin comes out clean.

NOTE: I of course did not waste  take the time to cook a pumpkin BUT if you did have one left over it might be a great use for it! I just used pumpkin from a can and I didn't have quite enough so I put in half a cup of apple sauce to make the full volume required (2cups).

Persevere and YOU will Triumph!

This weekend FLEW by. It was Stake Conference here in Nanaimo. Chris and I were able to attend the adult session on Saturday night, alone, and it was one of the best meetings we have been at in a LONG time. This of course was highly influenced by zero distraction by our sweet little angels. Chris and I both soaked up the Spirit and were taught many truths! After the session was over we went out for dessert at Earls and that was delicious as well. My favourite quote I think of the whole weekend was told to us by the wife of the traveling member of the quorum of the seventy. She said that one night when talking to President Monson he said to them “Persevere and You will Triumph!”

This statement stuck out to me for several reasons.  I want to have it made into a wall sticker and have it be my family’s motto. When I was in high school or maybe just after, my parents adopted the saying, it was:  “we do hard things”. I always like this BUT it made me feel like we do hard things because we can, because we have character or because we must as it is a part of life etc. I LOVE this new one because it says we do hard things AND it will be worth all the effort because you will WIN… you will conquer… Victory will be yours! Or in other words in the end all your hard work will pay off as you receive your eternal reward for your diligence! Lately I have been feeling that life is hard and just bogged down by all the things I feel I need to do or do better at or weaknesses to overcome. I also have been feeling like there are so many things I need to do that don’t really know how to do yet. Great perspective came when I heard that quote. I sometimes worry that I won't be able to properly teach my children a great work ethic. I feel like this quote if taken to be a moto can be used to teach our children to apply principles of work in all areas of life: sports, reading, education, music, and really ANY goal they set their minds to!

Nobility of Women

I have just finished cleaning my house. I have been doing laundry for almost two days straight. I hadn’t even let it go that long (a week and two days), but our washing machine is so small and I noticed that the 33minute cycle just wasn’t cutting it so the next one that fits our needs is a whopping 55minutes! Tonight I cleaned the bathroom and washed the floors. I even moved everything off the floor (bins, large toys, chairs) in order that it could be a wonderful thorough clean. I wanted to take a quick break before I wrap Kate’s bridal shower gift and make a card. What better way to take a break than to blog?

Today I had what feels like a practically perfect day! The girls and I dropped Chris off at work and then proceeded to Tim Hortons for breakfast and then to Walmart for a shop. Sadly, Walmart is the only thing open at 8:45am. We got home at about 9:45. I quickly put the girls in bed, changed into stretchy pants and worked out and showered before they fed at 11. The above for me makes for a great day, but it got even better. By noon the girls were EXAUSTED and went down to bed. I had a delicious lunch and then cuddled my over tired having, a hard time falling asleep, Abigail (she sleeps in our bed during daytime naps so they don’t wake each other up). We ended up both falling asleep. I woke up and gently removed myself from the bed. She woke up and put up a pathetic fight and was back to sleep within minutes. Isabelle and Abigail slept until 2:20 and 2:45 respectively. What did I do while they slept? I prepared dinner but MORE significantly I read the new Relief Society book. I had lunged into reading it as soon as I got it but haven’t lifted it up as often as I would have liked.

Yesterday my mom told me about how much she is loving it and this re-kindled my desires. In my efforts to me more focused and have some study time of my own I decided to recommit myself, YET AGAIN, to reading good books or scriptures when the girls sleep.

Well the book is AMAZING. I already knew it but now I want to tell everyone about it! You know how in life there are things that bog you down, stress you out, make you feel like life is hard? I.e. money, exercise, weight, friends, relationships, responsibilities, work, school, etc etc. Well I think we all have those feelings but as I read that book I felt all my stress wash away, I felt all my loneliness wash away and I was filled with peace, joy and happiness.

What made me feel like this? Well I have been thinking about it and I THINK it gives great perspective on living the gospel. It lets you learn from others experience. It helps you realize that you are a woman and allows the flame of divinity burn brighter within you. It shows you that people live through hard things grounded in their faith. It gives examples of other people experiencing the hand of the Lord in their lives daily. It teaches of the profound responsibility, opportunity and gift we have been given to be a part of the world wide Relief Society Organization of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  It teaches us to have faith, hope and charity; to strengthen home and family, increase personal faith and righteousness and help the poor and needy. In essence it teaches the purpose of Relief Society.

Why is this important? It teaches us as women what it is we need to do as Disciples of Christ in this day and age. It teaches us of the importance of who we are as woman. There are many organizations in the world today that profess to do good but none compare to the millions who are members of this largest women’s organization in the world. What we are doing is not new. Since the church was organized woman have been doing what we are doing. The circumstances are differnet but the principles of the gospel are the same. What are we trying to do? To do good to improve ourselves and to teach and uplift our family is what we are trying to do as women. We are also trying to return home to our Heavenly Father.

I will only share one quote that stuck out to me today. It was very powerful to me because I know I get caught up in seeking others approval OR in other words seeking to have others notice what I do or the progress I make. This often leaves me feeling like the things I do are not good enough because not all the time someone compliments the work or the effort etc. (I don’t think I am alone on this… women seek others approval… it’s a fact of being a woman). This is the quote by Eliza R. Snow “We like to be appreciated but if we do not get all the appreciation which we think is our due, what matters? We know the Lord has laid high responsibilities upon us, and there is not a wish or desire that the Lord has implanted in our hearts in righteousness but will be realized, and the greatest good we can do to ourselves and each other is to refine and cultivate ourselves in everything that is good and ennobling to qualify us for those responsibilities.”

This made me think of lots of different things. It applies to all of our relationships and also the duties we perform. I think we can get so caught up in feeling taken for granted for BUT in the end none of it matters as the Lord will reward our righteous efforts.

I don't want NO brown banana

Yes it is true the girls started eating different solid food this week! As you may have guessed from the title their first food after rice cereal is BANANA! The first night Abigail was very intrigued and enjoyed the new experience from the beginning. Isabelle was NOT happy when I started feeding it to her. She made the faces that Abigail made when she started eating rice cereal. By the end of the feed she had warmed up to the idea. Tonight the girls were fussing and I was like well I guess I better get them ready to eat and I fed them and they ate so much. Isabelle loved the banana tonight. Usually when I am feeding there is a pause of 2-3 seconds between each scoop PLUS the time it took to give a spoonful to the other babe. Well tonight it was scoop, scoop, scoop. No pauses. They were loving the food and swallowing as quickly as they could and were ready for the next scoop as soon as I was done with the other! Feeding them both is so funny. They sitting in their chairs and seeing the house from a different vantage point. I bought two bunches of bananas on Saturday today we are down to one, I have been eating so many because I know the girls don’t want any brown bananas!

Short and Sweet

I don't have much to say today BUT I had one of those moments.
I had been watching a show on the laptop while Chris was writing a paper I heard Isabelle and she had been sleeping for a couple hours (YAY!!) so I went to get her. As I opened the bedroom door and saw her little body kicking in excitement (Abigail was sleeping in our bed so that neither one would interput the other) with the biggest smile on her face looking up at me and I realized that she is MINE and I am a mother! Can life get better than being a Mama?!

Also I know I know I burned that Marshmallow Peppermint candle today AND it makes my house smell divine!!

Friday Night Shopping

So Chris isn’t feeling great. After the girls went to bed I said so are we just going to watch t.v. all night? He said he wasn’t feeling good enough to do anything. I complained telling him I was bored, the baseball game was almost over so I had put in my dues. I decided that I should go shopping alone as that would be better than sitting home watching t.v. SO I went to the mall. Before I walked out the door I said “I might spend lots of money…” no comment so I ran up the stairs!

I went to Bath and Body Works… I know I know that store made it into my blog already THIS week! Well tonight I went to go and get prizes for the games at my sister Kate’s bridal shower. I ended up getting hand soaps. The scents are to DIE for, just listen to the names: Cinnamon Raison Cookie, Cranapple Crisp, Carmel Apple, Coconut Lime Verbena and Sweet Pea. My eyes also caught a sale poster which read something to the effect of 2 candles for $25. I thought wow that is a great deal as one is usually $22.50. When I was in the store earlier this week and fell in love with the hot chocolate, homemade cookie. Tonight when I was there I noticed Mint Chocolate and Marshmallow Peppermint. Those are the two I got.

I don’t know why I have to blog about this but there is just something that you want to share about it because it smells so good and you want everyone to know so they can know they NEED to get it!!

Children

Just today on the phone I was discussing with Rachel the "funny" things that people say to me when they see I have twins. I told her that I could write a rant about it. She told me to. I said no. Then someone showed me a wonderful talk AND now I am going to write a blog about the silly things people say to me and more. I will quote parts of the talk and this will balance my rant and allow me to express why the things people say to me really bother me.

Where to start? Essentially every time I go out with the girls I will get at least one negative comment. I swear this isn’t an exaggeration. (I remember  years ago my sisters saying they got negative comments and I thought WHAT is the big deal… now I get it… it is offensive to the very core of who you are).

This week at Superstore the cashier said oh wow twins, how is it going? I said it is great! She questioned me saying REALLY? I said YES (I must admit I was a little rude in my tone…) SHE then proceeded to tell ME why it would be so hard. I told her well they are your kids and you love them so it doesn’t really matter. She wished me good luck with skepticism in her tone as I left the store!

At Costco people saw me walking with Abigail in a baby bjorn and Isabelle in the cart in her car seat and made comments like oh make room for her she deserves a break or not to be stopped by others in the isle… actually my life isn’t THAT bad… in fact it isn’t even bad: it is great.

At Thrifty Foods today I was asked if I was crazy. I said no! (I must admit I wasn’t as kind as I could have been, but really who starts a conversation by asking a complete stranger if they are crazy and expects it to go well?) SHE THEN asks me if they are twins!! WHAT are you kidding me do they look at MINIMUM 9 months apart?!!!! (You would actually be surprised a LOT of people ask that… I just laugh in my head because I don’t get it.)

At Walmart today someone asked me if they were identical. I told them kindly no. Although I can tell them apart very easily I know that people are in shock that there are TWO babies and don’t really look at features! That one is okay. But today at Walmart the reasoning behind this woman agreeing that perhaps they weren’t identical was because they were different sizes!! Hehehehe

Something else people always say is oh your hands must be full. This bothers me because I don’t want people viewing my life as hard because I have children. I feel looked down upon. I thought it was because I had twins and I wanted to say doesn’t any mom who has two kids have her hands full? Then I discovered I think a lot of Moms get the comment oh your hands must be full.

Something else that bothers me is when people tell me that they wouldn’t want twins. Chris doesn’t understand why this bothers me so perhaps I am just sensitive BUT it makes me feel negatively judged. I know they are not trying to hurt my feelings BUT it does. I think it does because I feel looked down upon… but really the people are talking about how THEY wouldn’t want it. It has nothing to do with me? I don’t know???

The reason I am writing this blog about my pet peeves is because when I read this talk tonight I got over it (as much as one can in 15 minutes... but I gained perspective). I was reminded of what really matters. I will forgive people for their insensitive comments and continue to be a cheerful happy mother of twins!

The talk is from Elder Neil L. Andersen (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints titled Children).

Last April, President Thomas S. Monson declared:

“Where once the standards of the Church and the standards of society were mostly compatible, now there is a wide chasm between us, and it’s growing ever wider. …

“The Savior of mankind described Himself as being in the world but not of the world. We also can be in the world but not of the world as we reject false concepts and false teachings and remain true to that which God has commanded.”⁶

Many voices in the world today marginalize the importance of having children or suggest delaying or limiting children in a family. My daughters recently referred me to a blog written by a Christian mother (not of our faith) with five children. She commented: “[Growing] up in this culture, it is very hard to get a biblical perspective on motherhood. … Children rank way below college. Below world travel for sure. Below the ability to go out at night at your leisure. Below honing your body at the gym. Below any job you may have or hope to get.” She then adds: “Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for.”⁷

As the world increasingly asks, “Are these all yours?” we thank you for creating within the Church a sanctuary for families, where we honor and help mothers with children.
It is a crowning privilege of a husband and wife who are able to bear children to provide mortal bodies for spirit children of God. We believe in families, and we believe in children.
The family is ordained of God. Families are central to our Heavenly Father’s plan here on earth and through the eternities. After Adam and Eve were joined in marriage, the scripture reads, “And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.”² In our day prophets and apostles have declared, “The first commandment that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force.”³     [Laura’s side note: for anyone who may not be aware Mormons are not opposed to birth control we just do believe in having families]

This commandment has not been forgotten or set aside in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.⁴ We express deep gratitude for the enormous faith shown by husbands and wives (especially our wives) in their willingness to have children. When to have a child and how many children to have are private decisions to be made between a husband and wife and the Lord. These are sacred decisions—decisions that should be made with sincere prayer and acted on with great faith.

End of quotations.



I guess what it really comes down to is that instead of being offended I should be grateful that I know what it is that I believe and I know what I want and have been blessed to have children and fulfill the measure of my creation as a woman. It has become my personal goal (right now) to not take offense but to remember to be grateful that I know who I am, why I am here and where I am going. My beliefs make me different from society but how much good is coming from society today anyways?

MY BODY

I have been thinking about bodies for about six months now and I am finally going to blog about it. I remember when I got pregnant I was really worried that even though I didn’t love my body (shape, size etc) that pregnancy would ruin my body. I remember having a conversation with someone and they asking me “aren’t you so excited to get a belly?” I said “NO!” I was so worried my belly would never go away!! (I of course didn’t say this).

When I found out I was growing NOT one baby but TWO my hopes for ever looking good again were dashed. I didn’t pay attention to the scale too much at the doctor’s office because I didn’t want to know. At one appointment the doctor told me I was doing really well not gaining too much for twins… WHAT I thought I felt like a beast. It got to the point where people who had had twins told me I looked like them, I then told them that I was having twins and they would say oh well that makes sense then. Until about 28 weeks people told me I looked great and when they asked me how far along I was they were shocked. I remember feeling good until 30 weeks and by 35 weeks I was making trips to the bathroom, computer, couch and BED and really that was about it. I was sleeping all the time. My body was being a full time Mama.

After the girls came I of course felt the relief of not having two babies inside of me and felt like a hundred thousand dollars (not a million bucks). I remember after I had birthed my babes a profound sense of gratitude for my body filling my mind. Perhaps I was realizing for the first time how wonderful it truly was. I also remember thinking about specific parts of my body that I was grateful for: my arms are long so I can hold two babies easy, I have big hips which I needed (maybe?), I am tall which allowed the babies to have enough room to grow (7lbs and 6lbs1oz is pretty good if you ask me!). All in all it was a perfect textbook pregnancy and it left me feeling extremely grateful for MY body for the first time in my life.

Sadly this feeling left the first day I went out “into the world” to go clothes shopping only a few short weeks after giving birth. It was summer and I was HOT in my winter clothes! Chris told me to go out and get what I needed and that he would take care of the girls. I was extremely grateful for his sacrifice as at that time it was a lot harder to have the girls alone for several hours. I went out and went to several stores. None had long enough shorts… so I didn’t even have to see if they would have fit. I found no capris that I liked. After 5 long hours I returned home with some t-shirts, capris and shorts. As I drove between malls and stores I was almost in tears that I saw nothing that would work for me (not my style, not my size, not modest). When I was driving home I cried and cried as I felt just awful about myself. I was mad at the world. For the perception it portrays of what a woman should look like and dress like. I was just so mad and felt like I was a little speck of un-important poop. I felt guilty for the fact that I would come home and be so sad… not a nice thing for Chris when he had given so much that I could go. Well when I returned home I saw my babies and it all didn’t matter it ALL was wiped away. I was so extremely happy to see them and to take care of them. I knew who I was again. I knew what my purpose was. I felt beautiful and important. I felt beautiful again… or maybe I just was focused on others that my worries drifted away and made me beautiful.

As I reflected on this experience I remembered an excerpt that Rachel (my sister) had on her blog. I will put bits and pieces of it here.

“Most people would probably cite one of my other achievements before motherhood: I write; I teach; I’m a good wife, a generous friend. Each of these pursuits is gratifying. None of them makes me feel beautiful.

Tired, careworn, perspiring under the Snugli straps, I wouldn’t expect to feel even presentable. But the consciousness of walking forward into life flanked by children is transforming; it is for someone like me, for whom motherhood has redeemed an unhappy past. Before children, I used to move down the street like someone who hoped no one would recognize her. Now, walking by reflective shop windows, I don’t think to check how I look. I already know. From this moment on, I never feel more beautiful than when I am with my children. Perhaps we’ve just emerged from the car, rumpled, cross, covered with dog hair―every mile spent together on the road undoes a minute of primping. New York to Philadelphia to visit the cousins: I might as well have skipped the shower, the mascara, the hairbrush. Still, when we walk through the door, I’m smiling from something cosmetics can’t deliver. It’s the consciousness of my good fortune.”

 In other news I have finally surfaced from having the babies- meaning I can do EXTRA things in a day besides the basics and still live to see another day without spending half of it in bed. As a result I have started working out again and BOY oh BOY does it feel good to be making progress! Just one month until Kate’s wedding… it is always good to have a target… after that it will be Christmas as my target! I mean who doesn’t want to look good in Christmas photos right?

Gratitude

Today I have been thinking a lot about things I am grateful for as it is Thanksgiving weekend. For FHE tonight Chris and I made separate lists of things we are grateful for and then shared the list and expounded on why we were grateful for the things on our list. We didn’t take too long (only about 8 minutes) to quickly write down the things that came to our mind. Today something I am very grateful for is something seemingly foolish… but bear with me.

I went shopping today for the first time in a long time with the girls. I love going shopping with them. They are still young enough to be perfectly behaved and people LOVE to see them. I love seeing people reactions. Chris on the other hand feels bothered by all the people who stop to talk. I digress… needless to say as I was shopping I went into Bath and Body Works. (Yes they have one in Nanaimo!) The sales clerk immediately approached me and was so sweet about the girls. I love it when younger women take interest because I think it reminds them of a desire they have that may lay dormant for children. ANYWAYS she informed me that the holiday scents were in! She told me about the Vanilla Bean Noel scent how it is to die for. Excitement lit up my face and I walked right to it. I took one smell and had a flood of memories wash over me. Rachel had given me lotion and body wash in this exact scent about 5 days after Chris and I started dating and I wore it EVERY day when we were dating. I told the sales clerk and she asked me if I wanted a bag to put my stuff in that I wanted. I said AH I don’t know if I should buy it. She said okay well just put some on your hand so you can take some home with you no matter what you decide. Well as I walked around the store for the next 15 minutes I decided I must have it! (They had a sale buy 3 get 3 free!!)

I walked out of the mall into the pouring rain with the biggest smile on my face. I picked Chris up from school later and told him about what I had done. I put a bottle of lotion to his nose and asked him if he knew what that smell was. He said it was familiar but had no idea. I told him and he was like “ahh that’s funny when you picked me (I walked over to the passenger side of the car) up you walked with a bounce in your step that reminded me of when we were dating!!”

So today I am grateful for Vanilla Bean Noel lotion (body spray and body wash) that brought back memories of falling in love and the excitement of that time of life. I am grateful to have fallen in love and for the wonderful things that have come because of that. I am also grateful for the gift of smell. I am also grateful for memories. Thanks Bath and Body Works!

Home Sweet Home

The first night we slept here back in August the sunset and sunrise were amazing. This morning there were LITTLE clouds and we again got to see a beautiful sunrise from our window on the water!! The pictures are taken from on our deck.

(summer sunset)

(summer sunrise)

(autumn morning)

(yes Chris is sleeping in there haha)

Yesterday (yes it took all day) I finalized setting up our house. Most of the pictures up, girls clothes organized (FINALLY) and our bedroom organized. I then cleaned it all really well. The washing machine and dryer were going NON-stop until 930 last night (started at about 8am).

I wanted to take some pictures this morning of my hard work to document our 2nd home as a family. (I had to do it this morning so I didn't have to reclean anything!) I couldn't go into the girls bedroom because they are sleeping. I forgot to photograph the river rock fireplace and the laundry facilities (another time).

Also props to Rachel for the idea of the tree above our bed! I love it. I woke up this morning a little groggy and was like what the heck is on the wall... oh yeah the tree!

Bath Time

Isabelle is a wiggly monkey. She will not stay still unless she has to (ie parent making her by changing her bum, drying her, feeding her etc). After her bath last night (which she LOVES baths) she rolled over the second after I put her on her towel. She proceeded to try and try and try again to stay on her tummy. I of course kept stopping her in order that I could dry her off (to prevent getting too cold AND peeing on the carpet) and get a diaper on her! We progressed and accomplished the goals. By this time Abigail was out of the bath and I had to dry her and get her diaper on. Isabelle of course was free from my control and rolled onto her tummy to find Abigail. Much to my delight her towel hood stayed on. I thought she looked HILARIOUS and I lost it laughing. Abigail then had no choice but her hood was put on her and she was put down on the ground to play with Isabelle. The girls were so happy to see each other (you know it had been 10 minutes) and immediately started talking (aka excited screams) to each other. It didn’t take long for them to start laughing. All the while I was laughing so hard because I thought they looked adorable. I took lots of pictures. After rolling back and forth several times and moving as much as she could in the small space Isabelle’s hood somehow got pulled over her eyes. I thought this was even funnier and instead of helping her (she wasn’t upset BUT she WAS trying to get it off (which was even funnier)) I took pictures of her!

Yesterday both of the girls (in VERY different ways) reached out for me when they happened to find themselves in tears. Isabelle on the floor on her tummy with one hand balancing her and the other reaching up and out for me (I thought it was so cute) and Abigail with her huge lungs screaming with both arms flailing around out for me to pick her up.

Today Abigail discovered that if she rolls her tongue (which she loves to do) to blow bubbles WITH food in her mouth will make a GREAT mess and is fun! Abigail also rediscovered that it is FUN to sleep during the day!! She always has been the better sleeper during the day. They both slept 1.5 hours in the morning AND then Abigail slept from 1145-245! Isabelle on the other hand was awake after 1hr but played happily in her crib! I cleaned like a mad woman and my house is FINALLY finished! We are settled! Oh Happy Day!

A Good Friend?

Yesterday was probably one of the hardest days that I have had being a mother (this explains the no post for yesterday). The girls are teething or have been teething and have developed AWFUL daytime naps. In an attempt to fix that, yesterday had lots of tears (yes from ALL the females in this house)! I went out last night to try and get a grasp on reality and remember life isn’t all crying babies and trying your best but sometimes just feeling like you REALLY have NO idea what you are doing. I ended up coming home in tears (influenced 90% by exhaustion I am sure) which was not exactly what I was looking for.

So here it is I am tired of being the “new” person.

I am tired of superficial conversations.

I am tired of feeling all alone.

It is not like I even have much time to spend out or developing great friendships but it doesn’t mean that I don’t want at least ONE. People here are really nice and I know that these things take time AND we haven’t exactly been here to develop friendships… so what I am saying is that I am not BLAMING others I am just saying I am tired of it!

How do you even have good friends when you are so busy just taking care of the basics for your family (dinner, cleaning, laundry, playing with babies, changing bums, feeding babies, bathing, exercising) NOT to mention strengthening your marriage or strengthen your testimony??? I just don’t see how it works and how do you start from scratch? BAH.

The other day I happened to go to Thrify Foods for some groceries after I had been to Save On Foods and I practically started crying because it was something familiar to me. I had shopped at Thrifty Foods for the last 5 years in Victoria. I hadn’t shopped there in over a month and THAT… shopping at Thrify Foods… reminded me of something familiar. I guess I just needed something familiar and didn’t even know it.

We love Nanaimo.

We love our home.

We love Chris’s school. We love being closer to family.

We love that being here is a step closer to what we want for Chris’s career.

So why is the change hard?

From the conference talks at both the Women’s Broadcast and the general sessions President Uchtdorf’s talks really stuck out to me. He reminded us that we are not unimportant to Heavenly Father. That He knows us, loves us and is very aware of how we are feeling (and can help us). And most of all that we are not alone. Another talk that stuck out to me (I believe it was Elder Scott’s talk) about how the people in the scriptures can become our friends and examples and by studying the scriptures it will help us not feel all alone. I have been striving ALL week to study my scriptures better in an effort (with moderate to high success) to fix my feelings of being all alone.

I think Satan tries so hard to bring down woman and mothers to make them feel this way and to also make them feel un-important in an effort to make us miserable and selfish (or maybe it is selfish first which brings on the miserable). He tries to make us think only of ourselves and THIS is the EXACT opposite of what we need to do when we are feeling this way. When I was planning the weekend getaway last weekend all I was thinking about was making Chris happy and I was the happiest person in the world (yes the whole world). Oh the cunning deceptions of Lucifee.

Take home points to ponder: why is a good friend so hard to come by? OR are they not and I am just being a big ol' baby? (don't say yes to that unless you say it with kindness) OR am I just not a good friend and as a result feel this way? OR is it that friends just are not as important when are you are married and I missed the memo?

Doctor Doctor

For the last seven years I have been bounced from family doctor to family doctor. Between walk in clinics at the University of Alberta to walk in clinics in Victoria to my own family doctor (who was the worst doctor I have EVER seen) and THEN to a doctor for my pregnancy (who always made me worried). Needless to say I have never been to satisfied with the care I have received. When the time came to move to Nanaimo I was eager to get a new family doctor. I must admit I didn't even take the girls for their four month check up! To be honest I didn't have the phone number OR internet to look it up BUT more influential in them NOT getting a check up was that I thought it would have been a COMPLETE waste of time! One time I went to this doctor because I had a really bad cough I expected the doctor to listen to my chest and ask some questions about duration, flem  etc. She looked at me and said "do you want some antibiotics?" What? Who asks that? I came to you for your expertice and knowledge and this is what I get!
When the dust finally settled here in Nanaimo I called Rachel and got a hook up for a family doctor here. Today was our first apointment with our new doctor. I was very impressed and SO happy to have a good family doctor AT LAST.
Thanks Rachel (and Justin)!

One

Yesterday I was thinking that I want to be a better journal keeper. I have been told that if you do something for 21 days it becomes a habit. Perhaps this can be my 21 day blog challenge to help be become a journal keeper. Reasons I want to be a better journal keeper include (but are not limited to) the following reasons:

1.       Isabelle and Abigail are doing new things everyday and I want to record it so I remember and also so perhaps one day they will read it and know how loved they are

2.       I also want to record our life and remember the things I am grateful for

3.       I want to remember the things that made me laugh!

I just put the girls down for their third nap of the day and as I carried Isabelle back to their bedroom tears welled up in my eyes as a wave of gratitude rolled over me that I have her, that she makes me laugh, and that she has soft oh so kissable cheeks! Side note: if I had been holding Abigail I would have had the same thoughts. Sometimes I get feeling sorry for myself that I am home with them and no longer have a career and most days are spent home being a mom and wife (this usually happens at a particular time of the month). Today I feel the exact opposite! Who would have thought that creating a home and a loving environment could provide so much satisfaction? I sure didn’t. Today I went grocery shopping (alone) and happened to find some ornamental gourds and then saw sunflowers. I had to buy them because fall is HERE! Thanksgiving is THIS weekend and I needed to feel autumn in our home.

On a funny note- today when I was making bottles for the 3pm feed I made a BIG mess! I got the bottles and put formula into the liners… or so I thought. I picked up the bottles to bring them to the stove so I could add water. I looked down and saw powder all over the counter. My initial reaction was how did that get there? Is the can of formula leaking? Did I miss the bottle without even realizing? (who even thinks these things!?!?) Then I realized that there was NO liner in the bottle. DUH who even does that! I didn’t want to get the powder all over cloths- I hate that mucky mess- so I grabbed the dust pan. The second before I wiped it off the counter I stopped and grabbed my camera to document my stupidity.

I'm hungry Mother. I really am!

Yesterday I couldn’t get over how cute my babies are! As I was getting ready to feed them I thought I need to document them in their chairs pre and post feed. Isabelle ate SO much; Abigail wasn’t too interested in it yesterday. I had to jam the spoon into her mouth for EVERY bite. I want to start feeding them other things but I am going to wait just a little bit longer. I think Isabelle will love new food.  Also I can’t say enough about the “feeding seats” that we got. They are significantly cheaper, take up significantly less space and are darn cute. Everytime I go to feed them I think of 101 Dalmations when the one puppy says "I'm hungry mother. I really am!"

 

Isabelle was yelling she WANTED to eat!

Our Sweet Girls!

Abigail

Abigail is growing up so fast! In the last month she has come alive in SO many ways. Probably one of my favorite things she does… actually let’s be honest I can’t choose one thing, but something she does that I absolutely love is talk to and laughs with/at her sister. They have a hoot together already.  Whenever I get her out of her crib and into the living room she is looking for Isabelle. A smile can always be found on her face at the moment she finds Isabelle. Abigail is a thinker. She is always looking at the world around her. She stares with such intensity that on several occasions my mom has said “I feel like she is looking into me and sees everything!” Abigail shows little expression on her face but has great intensity as she looks at the things around her. Abigail has recently started blowing bubbles with her tongue. She loves the sound it makes. Abigail also loves to talk. Abigail is getting very fast at rolling over and pushing herself around the room! She has a great set of lungs and loves to scream in excitement. Whenever I go into their bedroom to get her she is full of smiles and couldn’t be happier to be getting out of the crib. Abigail is great at putting herself to sleep. She loves sleep. She can practically sleep through anything; it was a skill she had to learn to survive sharing a room with her sister! Abigail is working hard at developing the strength to crawl. She is often on her hands working at getting her knees up under her! She typically lets out a scream of frustration or determination when her little knees fall back to the ground. Abigail is a drool queen. She has been working on getting teeth with no signs of success just yet. She loves her necklace that minimizes drool and relieves her teething pain. Abigail has discovered her hands and it getting very good at holding onto things and LOVES to chew on everything! Abigail is patient with me as I am clearly taking care of her sister too! Abigail watches me whenever she can. Abigail makes funny faces and scrunches up her nose or raises her eye brows when she smiles at you. Abigail is eating solids and did not like it at first and was tricked into swallowing with a soother! She has made quick and impressive progress! Abigail loves it when I read to her. She loves cuddling up beside me, and is especially still when I sing to her. Her favorites are a Child's Prayer, I am a Child of God, Teach me to walk in the Light, and Mine is a Home. Needless to say we are smitten with our little Abigail and she is a blast!

Isabelle

Isabelle is our angel who we already know will give us a run for our money when she gets more mobile AND becomes a teenager! She has discovered her hands and loves to pull everything to her sore teething mouth. Isabelle has two teeth now that have poked their sharp tips through her gums! Isabelle loves to look at pictures of Abigail. The other day I was looking at pictures to post and she was on my lap and she smiled and moved in excitement at all the pictures- she also talked to the screen every time a picture of Abigail appeared! Isabelle loves to smile and laugh. I swear she already knows how to make her sister laugh and will keep going just to keep Abigail laughing. Isabelle wears her emotions on her sleeve. There is no doubt when she is excited- not only does she have a smile but her legs and arms are moving vigorously in all direction when she is happy. Isabelle doesn’t love sleeping as much as Abigail but has learned that it is something that has to happen! Isabelle has a great whine! Unfortunately for her we can’t take her seriously when she does it and as I come to think of it she has stopped doing it as much! Isabelle LOVES their jumparoo! When she first discovered how to bounce she would bounce for over an hour non-stop! She would bounce from leg to leg with such expressions of joy on her face! One day her sleepers rubbed against her tiny toes for over an hour and rubbed her little toes raw and made them bleed… but this didn’t stop her! Isabelle will not stay still! She loves to roll around and will roll several times in a row to get from one place to another at lightning speed. She also rolls over when she is trying to sleep and this makes her happy for a time I am sure but leaves her unable to sleep and unhappy. Isabelle has a Fisher Price Aquarium in her crib and loves to fall asleep to the music. She has also discovered how to turn it on herself. Isabelle loves to talk. Isabelle loves to eat rice cereal. The first time she ate it was a success! She knew exactly what to do. Eating solids has helped her sleep through the night better again! She loves cuddling up beside me, and is especially still when I sing to her. Her favorites are a Child's Prayer, I am a Child of God, Teach me to walk in the Light, and Mine is a Home. Isabelle brings a smile to our faces every day. She is our bright little ham and we love her!

We love our daughters and feel that we have been so blessed to be given two! We are grateful for an abundance of love that we feel in our little family. We officially have four seats at the table and for some reason for me this hit home that we were officially a family of four!

Weekend Getaway!

On Wednesday of last week Chris confirmed that he had arranged everything so that he could go to “Managers Night” in Vancouver. We had discussed how it was his last one and a nice way to end the year and that he did indeed want to go. We had tried to get a babysitter or really even just think of a way to make it work. Nothing had come to mind and so the decision was made that he would go alone. I was annoyed and as time went on I got frustrated that I couldn’t go.  Getting back to last Wednesday… I dropped Chris off at class and inside I was fuming feeling sorry for myself and also just frustrated. I decided that that was it I was making it happen. So I called home to see if my mom and dad would come and babysit. I also called Kate and James to see if they could. I waited for two days to hear back if they could and in the mean time I secretly researched hotels, ferry schedules and directions. Friday morning came and my Mom called to say that they were willing to watch the girls. I was ecstatic. I called the hotel and made the reservation (I had secretly written down the credit card number so Chris had NO idea!). All day I was smiling. I packed my clothes, shoes, toiletries and hid them in the attic! I also had packed the camera in that bag hidden away. That night when we were bathing the girls Isabelle did something hilarious and I said “Chris hurry go get the camera!” He walked to the living room and reported that he couldn’t find it… I quickly dropped it as I had realized as soon as I asked for it that I had packed it! I was convinced he knew I was up to something. He had found a map printed off from Burrard St to Grouse Mountain, the camera was missing and I had done a couple of other rookie mistakes. When we were lying in bed that night I quietly said “I have a secret!” He guessed for SEVERAL minutes and clearly had NO idea what I was talking about. I gave him hints and still nothing. Eventually I spelled it out for him. He was so excited. He wished I had told him earlier and I told him I wasn’t planning on telling him until Kate showed up the next day!  

We caught the 12:50 ferry and got to our hotel with an hour to spare before we had to be at Grouse Mountain. We took the Skyline up to the top of the mountain. I must admit I was a little fearful at first but the view was amazing! We got to the top and the sun was shining and it was so beautiful. You could see all of Vancouver below. We had a great night and celebrated the end of another College Pro year and also the end of Chris’s business with College Pro.

(this picture does not due the view justice)

We stayed at a beautiful hotel in North Vancouver- when I found out it had Aveda products in the bathroom I was sold! It was the Pinnacle Hotel on Lonsdale.We were on a 6:20 am ferry back the next morning but I was VERY ready to see the girls. We got home and they were sleeping and we enjoyed the conference session without interruption. It was so nice to get away and have a great time.  In a few weeks when the final job is done Chris will officially be done running a College Pro Franchise. He has done a phenomenal job and I am proud of him. We are glad it is over and we are onto the next stage of life!

(when I saw these pictures I was sold!)