Monday, January 27, 2014

Endure it Well

I just feel like sharing this on here... perhaps so I will not lose it with time.


I’ve been asked to speak on the gospel principle of endurance; the focus being enduring it well. There are many accounts in the scriptures of the prophets teaching of the importance of enduring, for example “If ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, ye shall have eternal life” (2 Nephi 22:31) and then again “if they endure unto the end they shall be lifted up at the last day” (1Nephi 13:37). Over and over again the importance of enduring to the end is stressed in scripture. At some point we must begin to wonder why?  Or perhaps we begin to wonder why is enduring so vital? Or this is hard why must I do it? Why can’t it be taken from me? What role does the Atonement play in enduring?  What is the purpose behind the need to endure? The direction I want to go today is to answer some of these questions. I want to testify the principle of enduring to the end is vital if we are to claim the promised blessings associated with the ordinances and covenants we have entered in to.

To endure is to remain firm in a commitment to be true to the commandments of God despite, temptation, opposition and adversity. The word endure come from two Latin roots. The prefix en means “within”. The remainder a verb durare, means “to be firm or solid.” Thus, to endure means “to become firm within yourself.” To endure connotes a commitment within one’s soul. Thus we can conclude that enduring to the end is a very personal component to our salvation and exaltation. It fundamentally doesn’t matter what ANY ONE else does or doesn’t do. I can’t be saved by my parents, my husband or my children. Ultimately the unwavering faith and testimony necessary for exaltation has to be my own. In the Doctrine and Covenants we read concerning the spirit children of God who would come to mortality that would be tested “and we will prove them herewith, to see if they will do all things whatsoever the Lord their God shall command them.” That explanation helps us understand WHY we face trials in life.

I know it is easy to fear, to be tired of, or to feel we lack the strength to stay the course when we are going through life’s adversity. I love Elder Maxwell’s thought provoking words, “How could there be refining fires without enduring any heat? Or greater patience without enduring some instructive waiting? Or more empathy without bearing one another’s burdens- not only that other’s burdens may be lightened, but that we may be enlightened through greater empathy? How can there be later magnification with-out enduring some present deprivation?” I find this quote really puts into perspective the purpose of the need to endure adversity.

In a talk by President Eyring he said a District President he worked with gave him this advice, “When you meet someone, treat them as if they were in serious trouble, and you will be right more than half the time”. President Eyring said he thought the man was a pessimist, but now more than 40 years later he can see how well the man understood the world and life. With this in mind I wanted to spend time learning from Joseph Smith’s life as there are powerful principles taught as we do.

Elder Holland gave a powerful CES broadcast in 2008 titled Lessons from Liberty Jail.

In the Prophet Joseph’s letters, he spoke of the jail being a “hell, surrounded with demons … where we are compelled to hear nothing but blasphemous oaths, and witness a scene of blasphemy, and drunkenness and hypocrisy, and debaucheries of every description.”2 “We have … not blankets sufficient to keep us warm; and when we have a fire, we are obliged to have almost a constant smoke,” he said.3 “Our souls have been bowed down”4 and “my nerve trembles from long confinement,” Joseph wrote.5 “Pen, or tongue, or angels,” could not adequately describe “the malice of hell” that he suffered there.6 All of this occurred during what, by some accounts, was considered the coldest winter on record in the state of Missouri.

Most of us, most of the time, speak of the facility at Liberty as a “jail” or a “prison”--and certainly it was that. But Elder Brigham H. Roberts (1857–1933) of the First Council of the Seventy spoke of the facility as a temple, or, more accurately, a “prison-temple.”7 Elder Neal A. Maxwell (1926–2004) used the same phrasing in some of his writings. Certainly this prison-temple lacked the purity, beauty, comfort, and cleanliness of our modern temples. The speech and behavior of the guards and criminals who came there were anything but temple-like. In fact, the restricting brutality and injustice of this experience at Liberty would make it seem the very antithesis of the liberating, merciful spirit of our temples and the ordinances performed in them.

So in what sense could Liberty Jail be called a “temple,” and what does such a title tell us about God’s love and teachings, including where and when that love and those teachings are made manifest? In precisely this sense: that you can have sacred, revelatory, profoundly instructive experiences with the Lord in any situation you are in. Indeed, you can have sacred, revelatory, profoundly instructive experiences with the Lord in the most miserable experiences of your life--in the worst settings, while enduring the most painful injustices, when facing the most insurmountable odds and opposition you have ever faced.

He continues

In one way or another, great or small, dramatic or incidental, every one of us is going to spend a little time in Liberty Jail--spiritually speaking.

But the lessons of the winter of 1838–39 teach us that every experience can become a redemptive experience if we remain bonded to our Father in Heaven through it.

Elder Holland speaks so powerfully I will continue with some other things he shared that night, he says:

Everyone faces trying times; when that happens we can sometimes fear that God has abandoned us, and we might be left, at least for a time, to wonder when our troubles will ever end. As individuals, as families, probably everyone has had or will have an occasion to feel as Joseph Smith felt when he cried from the depth and discouragement of his confinement: “O God, where art thou? … How long shall thy hand be stayed … ? Yea, O Lord, how long shall [thy people] suffer … before … thy bowels be moved with compassion toward them?” (D&C 121:1–3).

Whenever these moments of our extremity come, we must not succumb to the fear that God has abandoned us or that He does not hear our prayers. He does hear us. He does see us. He does love us. When we are in dire circumstances and want to cry, “Where art Thou?” it is imperative that we remember He is right there with us--where He has always been! We must continue to believe, continue to have faith, continue to pray and plead with heaven, even if we feel for a time our prayers are not heard and that God has somehow gone away. He is there. Our prayers are heard. And when we weep He and the angels of heaven weep with us.

When lonely, cold, hard times come, we have to endure, we have to continue, we have to persist. Keep knocking on that door. Keep pleading. In the meantime, know that God hears your cries and knows your distress. He is your Father, and you are His child.

We are not alone in our little prisons here. When suffering, we may be in fact nearer to God than we’ve ever been in our entire lives. That knowledge can turn every situation into a would-be- temple.

Lessons from Liberty jail also teach us that even the worthy will suffer: In giving us this sober reminder of what the Savior went through, the revelation from Liberty Jail records, “The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?” (D&C 122:8).

No, Joseph was not greater than the Savior, and neither are we. And when we promise to follow the Savior, to walk in His footsteps, and be His disciples, we are promising to go where that divine path leads us. And the path of salvation has always led one way or another through Gethsemane. So if the Savior faced such injustices and discouragements, such persecutions, unrighteousness, and suffering, we cannot expect that we are not going to face some of that if we still intend to call ourselves His true disciples and faithful followers.

I also wanted to share from President Faust. In referring to the Martin Handcart Company he retells an account told to him by President McKay;

President McKay relates an occurrence which took place some years after the heroic exodus: “A teacher, conducting a class, said it was unwise ever to attempt, even to permit them [the Martin handcart company] to come across the plains under such conditions. (poverty, lacking proper equipment and late in the season)

“[According to a class member,] some sharp criticism of the Church and its leaders was being indulged in for permitting any company of converts to venture across the plains with no more supplies or protection than a handcart caravan afforded.

“An old man in the corner … sat silent and listened as long as he could stand it, then he arose and said things that no person who heard him will ever forget. His face was white with emotion, yet he spoke calmly, deliberately, but with great earnestness and sincerity.

“In substance [he] said, ‘I ask you to stop this criticism. You are discussing a matter you know nothing about. Cold historic facts mean nothing here, for they give no proper interpretation of the questions involved. Mistake to send the Handcart Company out so late in the season? Yes. But I was in that company and my wife was in it and Sister Nellie Unthank whom you have cited was there, too. We suffered beyond anything you can imagine and many died of exposure and starvation, but did you ever hear a survivor of that company utter a word of criticism? Not one of that company ever apostatized or left the Church, because everyone of us came through with the absolute knowledge that God lives for we became acquainted with him in our extremities.

“‘I have pulled my handcart when I was so weak and weary from illness and lack of food that I could hardly put one foot ahead of the other. I have looked ahead and seen a patch of sand or a hill slope and I have said, I can go only that far and there I must give up, for I cannot pull the load through it.’” He continues: “‘I have gone on to that sand and when I reached it, the cart began pushing me. I have looked back many times to see who was pushing my cart, but my eyes saw no one. I knew then that the angels of God were there.

“‘Was I sorry that I chose to come by handcart? No. Neither then nor any minute of my life since. The price we paid to become acquainted with God was a privilege to pay, and I am thankful that I was privileged to come in the Martin Handcart Company.’” (Relief Society Magazine, Jan. 1948, p. 8.)

Here then is a great truth. In the pain, the agony, and the heroic endeavors of life, we pass through a refiner’s fire, and the insignificant and the unimportant in our lives can melt away like dross and make our faith bright, intact, and strong. In this way the divine image can be mirrored from the soul. It is part of the purging toll exacted of some to become acquainted with God. In the agonies of life, we seem to listen better to the faint, godly whisperings of the Divine Shepherd.

From my own experiences, and those especially over the last year I can add my testimony to what I have shared today. We went through more in the last year then I could ever hope to explain in a 15 minute talk. But I can tell you that I felt peace- not always because I am still learning to turn to the Savior. And through the year I learned that God does not abandon us. He is with us. Angels minister to us. If we will keep going the path becomes clear. Things don’t always make sense. The list of burdens on us can be VERY long but we can still endure. I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are upon us. That bad days come to an end, that faith always triumphs and that heavenly promises are always kept. I am going to take Elder Hollands words to express my testimony of angels, both heavenly and the mortal kind. In doing so I am testifying that God never leaves us alone, never leaves us unaided in the challenges we face. Always there are those angels who come and go all around us, seen and unseen, known and unknown, mortal and immortal.

May we ever remember our role and purpose in the plan of salvation and take courage that the Lord is on our side as we face the adversity of our days in mortality. We must prove our discipleship and our commitment to our Father in Heaven and in doing so we must prove that we will live the gospel and develop God’s characteristics  in the best or easy times and in the worst or hard times

Thursday, January 9, 2014

2014

Goals for 2014

1) Become more self aware and internally motivated. Leading to me acting in a certain way because I want it... not because society/others think a certain way/imposed/others expectations

2) Exercise three times a week. Motivation is to feel good not to be a certain size.

3) Keep a simple journal.

4) Read scriptures much more regularly and pray personally.

5) Read more watch less.



Growing up!

I do not in ANY way mean to offend any parent from this post. Motherhood is different for EVERYONE. I simply am sharing my thoughts. I believe you will parent the best way for you and your family and I simply desire to do the same with my family. This post is simply expressing the desire for everyone to get along and stop cutting each other down.

I've had a vent brewing in my mind for MONTHS. Since Olivia was born. I titled this blog post growing up, because that it what I have been doing since she was born. I feel like I got a lot of slack for the way I did things with the girls. Sleeping through the night, bottle feeding, letting them cry it out on occasion, having a routine... the list is endless. The general public always had their negative two cents to say. I was shook to the core by the time I had Liv. I didn't know what to expect. Would my experience with breast feeding lead to a completely different experience as a mother to Liv? Would my baby have to eat every hour like people told me because she was breastfed? Would I ever sleep through the night with a breast fed baby? Was allowing my baby to learn to self soothe going to cause major damage down the road? Had I royally screwed up my girls? The list of doubting questions was endless.

Needless to say that after a very short time with Liv I knew one thing FOR SURE. How your baby feeds and sleeps is a DIRECT link to you. It is a STYLE that a parent chooses. Period. I choose one way. You can choose another way that works for you AND here is the best part IT IS OKAY!!!! I need to be happy, my baby needs to be happy and so does the rest of my family. AND so does yours!!! SO DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU!!! Be honest with yourself. Are you happy? Does every day feel too hard? Are there things that you can change?

There are endless (I feel) posts on Facebook about sleep, feeding (solids) and breastfeeding. Enough to make a strong minded, opinionated, educated woman, like myself, DOUBT myself. Everyone posts an opinion blog that is for the vast majority very biased in whatever their view. It was DRIVING me nuts!!! It was making me doubt myself so much. It was making me feel like I wasn't doing a good job. Eventually I put my finger on what it was that was bothering and learned that this is NOT the way I am supposed to be feeling. Lesson learned. These blogs are ridiculous (yes my opinion). One sided opinions. I've stopped reading them for another reason beyond that they make me doubt myself. They also pit women against each other. We don't need to get against each other. We are doing one of the (if not the) hardest things we will do in life. RAISING CHILDREN into ADULTS. Ones that we hope will be full of love, respectful, hard working, resilient, adaptable, able to cope and surely able to do a little better than we have. Why aren't we cheering each other on instead of building the divide. Again YOU DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU and I WILL DO WHAT WORKS FOR ME!!!

Since coming to this realization and "growing up" I genuinely do not judge about the way another person parents. I fully and whole heartedly believe that everyone is doing the best they can. IF IF IF someone asks for advice then answer the QUESTION they asked with compassion always supporting them don't use it as an opportunity to slam something down their throat that you may feel passionately about. We need to build each other up and support each other. This is a lonely world we live in today.

In another area of parenting. I got upset today because of the heartache that I see going on around me. Sad families. Sad relationships. Damage from childhood causing sadness later in life.  I thought to myself:

WHY DO PEOPLE GET SO CAUGHT UP IN THE FIRST YEAR OF LIFE WITH WHAT I FEED MY BABY AND HOW I CHOOSE TO HAVE MY BABY SLEEP WHEN THERE ARE SO MANY WORSE THINGS WE CAN DO IN OUR FAMILIES (affecting our kids) THAT HAVE LONG TERM EFFECTS??????

I am not a granola girl. I eat fresh fruits and vegetables, and whole grain foods. But I do enjoy a treat and I am not at a place in life where I am going to cut it all out. I do for the most part eat healthy.  I am an educated woman. I do things with purpose and think before I act. I am not perfect. I do act with the best intent with all that I do.

This week my baby who normally will sleep through the night stopped. She was four months on January 1st, not that long ago. Instantly the battle of introducing solids v.s. waiting until the six month recommended age to introduce solids began. I started hating breast feeding because it wasn't giving my baby enough to hold her over on what we have established as normal for us. I noticed she wasn't her happy self, to others I am sure she still seemed very happy but I knew she had changed just a little. I had a new onset of the feeling for freedom. Bottles seemed like a good idea. It is slower digesting, perhaps this would be the better option than introducing solids. I flew several different ideas around in my head. Why does it matter if she sleeps through the night? Doesn't she need it? Or is it a want? A habit? Why would I be stuck on a routine if it isn't working- shouldn't I just feed her more frequently?  ANYTHING other than breaking the rules right? WRONG.

Whose rules? Was I going to let other people make my decision for me or was I going to do what I thought was best? I know this is a heated topic. I really don't care to get into it with anyone. You do what works for you and your family. I will do what works for me and my family.  I do not think I am harming my baby (who happens to love it, I have found out). I believe that I am allowing her to grow and develop. I also know that I am allowing her to get the sleep that she needs to allow her body to rest and grow and develop. It is a win-win situation for us. Everyone in my family needs to be happy and feel loved.

I feel really strongly about doing the best that we can and always improving. I also feel really strongly about being kind to each other. We are raging a war against sin, immorality and evil not against each other. Lets remember that and lift each other instead of damning another persons choice as they do their best at something that doesn't come with a handbook!!!